Be the messenger

The process of being vulnerable is one that I struggle with. I have had this blog idea for many years, but I sat on it like an egg. Then I mustered the courage to create the blog, but not actually blog. Well...that's not how it works. I have to face my fears around transparency and vulnerability. I have a lot to say and to offer people, but I'm not helping anyone by being silent. I have to take the first steps up the mountain in order for things to really take off. But those first plodding, unsure steps I have to take alone. I have to prove that I am consistent and that I can do it - if to no one but myself.

I have always been a fan of exposure therapy. If it scares me then that's exactly why I need to do it. Growth only happens from a place from risk not comfort. And I have been comfortable for far too long. I need to shake things up. So since journaling about my intimate thoughts and visions and then posting them for the world to see scares the crap out of me then that's exactly what I'll do. Expansion is always just on the other side of fear.

I'm an oracle, but I'm afraid to share my visions because well...they come true...and they aren't always pleasant. Well that in and of itself says a lot. The point of being an oracle is to provide guidance, but if I'm not actively guiding people am I actually an oracle? Well maybe I have the inherent gifts, but if I'm not actively using them for their true purposes then I'm wasting them. I'm denying my gift from the Gods and failing to complete my mission. It is not enough for me to journal about things that come to fruition and just be like, "Yep, see, it's in my journal dated 2 months ago. I foretold that!" I can't wait for affirmation or confirmation to post. I know what I'm being told and my visions are true. Everyone around me knows it, too. My guides are growing restless with providing expert knowledge only for it to go unheralded in my personal journal.

My job is to get the messages out, that's it. Plain and simple. Just be the messenger. I'm sure my FedEx guy is not worried about what's in the actual packages he delivers. He just has to complete his route. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to complete my route and deliver the messages.